All Entries
A merry little surge of electricity piped by automatic alarm from the mood organ beside the bed awakened me.Entry ID: 109
Author: Rick Deckard
Date & Time: 2006-02-03 18:03:35
I felt exhausted from the strange dreams that plagued my sleep. Who wasEntry ID: 110
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-03 19:38:48
eating my cheese, I wondered? Did I have mice? Or was thereEntry ID: 111
Author: Sarah
Date & Time: 2006-02-03 22:02:09
another reason I was a few crumbs short. It occurred to me that my obsession with cheese had to stop, before I began to hallucinate with desireEntry ID: 112
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-03 22:07:09
. Who knows where those desires could lead as the last time I had found myself high in the foothills of the Himalayas in search of the temple ofEntry ID: 113
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-04 12:48:20
Doom. After 2 years of fruitless searching, it suddenly dawned on me, I was searching for a film title so I gave up and headedEntry ID: 114
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-02-04 15:25:59
toward the promised landsEntry ID: 115
Author: Will1
Date & Time: 2006-02-04 16:34:25
of Kubla Khan where there aint no short handled shovels and little streams of alcohol come a trickling down the rocks. I picked up aEntry ID: 116
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-04 16:39:34
handgrenade and charged toward the front. By the time I realised what had happened, it was too late. I'dEntry ID: 117
Author: Piddle
Date & Time: 2006-02-04 16:56:12
woken up to find myself lying in bed wearing my Aunt Agathas' old nighty and next to me was the biggest hairiestEntry ID: 118
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-04 18:16:51
butterfly I had ever seen. The window adjacent to the fireplace was slightly open, I deduced this to be the point of entry.Entry ID: 119
Author: Robb
Date & Time: 2006-02-04 22:00:51
The question was then how best to deal with the intruder? and was he alone?Entry ID: 120
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-05 10:06:21
My suspicion was that he was alone and that I might be able to neutralise him with a fire extinguisher. All I had to do was wait for the moment whenEntry ID: 121
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-05 18:47:39
his back was turned, at which point I'd charge at him. Unfortunately, not everything went to plan.Entry ID: 122
Author: WebSeed
Date & Time: 2006-02-05 23:07:39
As I went to strike he pirouetted swiftly on his wooden leg which caused me to lose my balance and I landed face first in aEntry ID: 123
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 08:50:30
rather seductive looking four-poster bed. As I struggled to my feet, he casually strolled across the room and suggestedEntry ID: 124
Author: grubby
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 12:00:46
an orthopaedic mattress would be of benefit given my current situation. I had strained it earlier in the week whilst in the garden; if only I had the knowledgeEntry ID: 125
Author: Robb
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 14:41:33
of Alan Titchmarsh. It was whilst digging up a fine crop of turnips that I felt a sharp pain shoot up the base of my spine, causing me to drop myEntry ID: 126
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 14:52:19
hoes. I had been in the pimp game for a whileEntry ID: 127
Author: Phil
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 15:31:17
last week. It was a new club on the east side of town, a little seedy in my opinion butEntry ID: 128
Author: Robb
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 15:35:02
I had no problems getting to grips with the task in hand. It started to become a problem once I realised how many people were watching, so IEntry ID: 129
Author: grubby
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 16:40:15
turn on. I ripped and clawed at the flimsy material with my hands and my teeth;Entry ID: 130
Author: Dingo
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 18:07:27
I was desperate to get into the bag of salted peanuts, but my strength had escaped me.Entry ID: 131
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 19:00:45
I decided there was nothing for it, I would have to summon the powers of greyskull for this beast. "I HAVE THE POWER" I cried, but all I got wasEntry ID: 132
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 20:02:12
a chicken leg that had been at the back of the fridge for weeks. I took it out and gave it a sniff, it seemed ok but the taste reminded me ofEntry ID: 133
Author: Robb
Date & Time: 2006-02-06 23:42:25
a deep fried guinea pig that I had once enjoyed whilst trekking through deepest darkest Peru in search of a lost tribe who were reported to engage in acts soEntry ID: 134
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-07 09:50:02
mundane, that they remained undiscovered for centuries - I didn't find them. However, I did meet another tribe who engaged in acts so terrible thatEntry ID: 135
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-07 10:19:32
they'd even been shunned by their neighbours, a group of satanic cannibals with a penchant for random, drawn-out torture. So I turned to Dr Forbes and asked ifEntry ID: 136
Author: Fraser
Date & Time: 2006-02-07 15:42:46
we should exterminate them using our latest "death-ray" technology. Dr Forbes suggested an easier method of neutralizing our adversaries, involvingEntry ID: 137
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-07 18:09:30
the sexual organs of small tree frog, ear wax, and a large roll of gaffer tape. The result wasEntry ID: 138
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 14:02:25
a relaxing dinner in the park with Brad Pitt! She turned to him and gently whispered in his ear "I wantEntry ID: 139
Author: Helsbels
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 17:08:34
to go home now. Your third eye is slightly disturbing me and I don't think I can continue this conversation." He moved hisEntry ID: 140
Author: grubby
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 17:52:27
consciousness closer to what he used to be, used to feel. He hated it with a passion and dreamed of the day when it would evaporate from his scrambled psyche,Entry ID: 141
Author: Rukowski
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 18:07:17
but, like teenage acne, it never did. Eventually, he left the park and called in at his grandmother's. She was a miserable old harpy, but was likely to dieEntry ID: 142
Author: Clur
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 19:24:22
sooner or later which would mean that he no longer had to hide behind the macho image he had hidden behind for all these years. At last he was free to becomeEntry ID: 143
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 21:37:29
a 21st century guy; free to pluck his eyebrows and wear make upEntry ID: 144
Author: Wolf
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 22:54:21
, although using moisturising cream would be taking things too far. Dr Forbes and I much prefer the natural feel ofEntry ID: 145
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-08 23:33:49
sandpaper on skin and the soothing action it creates when rubbing into those hard to reach places. After an hour or so of extreme exfoliatingEntry ID: 146
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-02-09 10:34:41
dip the hard bits into some hot oil, add some chopped onions, tomato and fresh basil. Serve cold. "hmm, this tastesEntry ID: 147
Author: Helsbels
Date & Time: 2006-02-09 11:29:09
absolutely disgusting", remarked the Hon. Reverend. It was a matter of honour that, having shown extreme impertinence, I gave the man a goodEntry ID: 148
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-09 13:03:55
time. So off we went to Spearmint Rhino; a strange experience for a man of the cloth. After getting inside we were greeted byEntry ID: 149
Author: Phil
Date & Time: 2006-02-09 15:32:19
the elusive Dr Forbes who seems to appear and disappear like a veritable will of the whisp. We were particularly surprised to see him here as he had vowed to stoEntry ID: 150
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-09 20:56:51
ck tomato soup only on Saturdays and today was a Tuesday. 'Hey Forbsey', I whispered, 'Got any of your special, out the back?'. Forbes smiled and gesturedEntry ID: 151
Author: Cas
Date & Time: 2006-02-10 00:03:01
toward the trap door leading to his cellar. "They're down there mate. Careful though, one of them nearly bit my arm off the other day". I began to walk toward the hatch whenEntry ID: 152
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-10 16:56:53
the trap door slowly creaked open. I froze instantly and could not believe my eyes. A big blue plasticine creature crawled out from dark. "Berk's the name"Entry ID: 153
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-02-10 17:37:50
. The blue plasticine creature brought back my childhood memories. I ate so much that I gotEntry ID: 154
Author: Dodgywheel
Date & Time: 2006-02-11 00:00:00
such a belly ache, I really shouldn't gorge myself like that! But I do fancy some yummy scrummyEntry ID: 155
Author: Sarah
Date & Time: 2006-02-12 21:15:10
Coco pops. Your milky milky coco pops. But what I really like in the morning is an incy wincy teeny weenyEntry ID: 156
Author: Nic
Date & Time: 2006-02-12 21:57:16
yellow polka dot bikini. Any biography of Timmy Mallet wouldn't be complete without explaining the most traumatic event in his life - the time when heEntry ID: 157
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-13 09:16:47
was inexplicably inaugurated as Pope Timmy the 1st having wowed the College of Cardinals with a spectacular display of naked hangliding over the Vatican. ThisEntry ID: 158
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-13 18:18:02
pleased the cardinals so much, and they burst into song "Blue moooon" suddenly the pope appearedEntry ID: 159
Author: Dodgywheel
Date & Time: 2006-02-14 19:29:19
and said, "no good asking the gurner, he has the artisitic inclinations of a constipated walrus"Entry ID: 160
Author: Mr.Black
Date & Time: 2006-02-14 20:41:54
. The gurner didn't take kindly to such an attack, prompting him to pull a face at said person. Reeling back in shock, the hideous face causedEntry ID: 161
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-02-14 23:09:19
a commotion amongst the expectant crowd. Jethro, however, remained steadfast - he knew this was his moment. He charged at the gurner with his pitchforkEntry ID: 162
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-15 08:46:54
, but the gurner was wilier than a two tailed fox with a degree in cunningness from the Cunningness University and easily dodged the oncoming implement. JethroEntry ID: 163
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-15 22:00:29
, the Cornish comedian, was not so lucky. The oncoming implement smashed into his chest, impaling him to a near by benchEntry ID: 164
Author: Clur
Date & Time: 2006-02-16 21:12:18
that marked the spot of the first alien landing in Lancaster. The day they abducted Phil went down in history forEntry ID: 165
Author: Helsbels
Date & Time: 2006-02-16 21:35:38
the longest ever probing session. Eventually the aliens became despondent when he pointed out their futile business model. They started data harvestingEntry ID: 166
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-16 22:25:51
to feed the alien babies, Phil and Will junior. The data is full of protein enabling the kids to grow particularly largeEntry ID: 167
Author: Helsbels
Date & Time: 2006-02-17 16:43:13
and uncommonly hairy which is particularly unfortunate as alien babies tend to ooze large amounts of intergalactic snot from their 45 nostrils. I therefore setEntry ID: 168
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-17 18:00:51
my laser gun from stun to kill, and let them have it with both barrels. They dropped faster than a tarts knickers and IEntry ID: 169
Author: Clur
Date & Time: 2006-02-17 20:14:36
took pleasure in scalping the little blighters. After my adventures in space I travelled back home to the planet earth, and sought comfort inEntry ID: 170
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-20 09:18:30
ASDA. My clothes had become strangely scratchy in space and needed a good hot wash with some fabric softener. This done, I felt able to faceEntry ID: 171
Author: Clur
Date & Time: 2006-02-21 13:25:54
upside down and practise my new kung fu move, the death spin. The moves are similar to that of the locomotion by Kylie but the results can causeEntry ID: 172
Author: Helsbels
Date & Time: 2006-02-21 14:52:56
excessive chafing around the thighs if your lycra bodysuit does not fit like a glove. This was all bye the bye as I had in fact given such activities up toEntry ID: 173
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-21 15:58:13
pursue my career in espionage. When going incognito, I like to don a gingerEntry ID: 174
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-21 22:21:17
nut perched on top of a strawberry blonde wig. The disguise worked well until the biscuit fell off mid operation, resulting inEntry ID: 176
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-02-22 12:53:44
a trail of crumbs which allowed Hansel and Gretel to return safely to their home at the edge of the woods. I had never trusted small children in lederhosen soEntry ID: 177
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-02-24 14:00:35
I locked them in the cupboard under the stairs. Childline don't like it, but sometimes, mother does know best. After 6 daysEntry ID: 178
Author: Clur
Date & Time: 2006-02-24 22:45:45
I fed them all a wholesome bowl of gruel flavoured with essence of shrew. I had gained quite a reputation in the village for my eccentricity, butEntry ID: 179
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-02-25 19:16:00
this was primarily because of my ponchant for pig wrestling wearing just my tighty whities in the front garden. None of this explained why the vicar had givenEntry ID: 180
Author: snotlout
Date & Time: 2006-02-27 18:36:41
the bishop a damn good bashing but at least he looked a little more relaxed for his afternoon service. Later that evening the bewildered bishopEntry ID: 181
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-03-01 13:36:22
contemplated the day's events - it had all been quite traumatic. If there was a God, he was cruel. He denounced his faith there and then and sought Dr. ForbesEntry ID: 182
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-01 14:23:17
and his bag of magic mushrooms. A quick brew from the hallucinogenic fungi would fill my heart with joy and free me from burden of religious strife. I thrust outEntry ID: 183
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-03-01 16:20:13
my manly chest, on which I prided myself, and took another bite. I really was starting to feel betterEntry ID: 184
Author: Sarah
Date & Time: 2006-03-02 22:43:39
so much so, that I stripped off my restrictive lederhosen, oiled my loins, and headed for the local lido. The ladies of Bavaria had better watch out becauseEntry ID: 185
Author: sabrinatheteenagewitch
Date & Time: 2006-03-03 21:51:56
I had the appetite of a sexual tyrannosaurus and I was in need of some lovin'. Unfortunately, I had failed to consider it was the coldest winter on record and myEntry ID: 186
Author: my name is earl
Date & Time: 2006-03-03 22:10:16
cojones were a visual testament to the chill factor. Thankfully, I had remembered to pack a blow torch into my rucsack that day. I quicklyEntry ID: 187
Author: Jolly Green Giant
Date & Time: 2006-03-03 22:30:31
constructed a small hot water system to warm my nether regions from pipes I found in a conveniently parked van belonging to a small Italian plumber with a bigEntry ID: 188
Author: my name is earl
Date & Time: 2006-03-04 16:22:50
wrench. The Italian plumber then began to talk at length about how he cunningly smuggles drugs in his colostimy bag to confuse the customs dogs. When he wasEntry ID: 189
Author: Rich
Date & Time: 2006-03-05 14:23:22
young, he used to hide them in his novelty moustache, but an unfortunate shaving accident led to himEntry ID: 190
Author: Stemily
Date & Time: 2006-03-05 16:14:40
cutting off the whole of his upper lip. However, by attaching extensions to his nose-hair, he could simulate the appearance ofEntry ID: 191
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-05 20:24:49
Margaret Thatcher. Maggie saw the imposter posing as her on Question Time whilst she was at home brewing up a potion from eye of Newt and testicle ofEntry ID: 192
Author: Clause IV
Date & Time: 2006-03-05 22:38:32
Norman. The resultant concoction turned her into 'the Iron Lady', a super hero with handbagging powers the world had seldom seen. The plumbing imposterEntry ID: 193
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-03-06 08:34:20
didn't stand a chance. Witnesses to the event will never forget the brutal nature of Maggie's perfectly aimed strikes to Mario's backside. The swelling was immenseEntry ID: 194
Author: Grim Reaper
Date & Time: 2006-03-07 11:10:49
and only a firm rub down with hot soapy lather from the skilled hands of immense Turkish masseuse prevented it from being amputated. All that from a small quipEntry ID: 195
Author: my name is earl
Date & Time: 2006-03-07 21:16:27
about the price of bread. Beryl set about investigating the circumstances in which the death occured. Her only clue wasEntry ID: 196
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-08 12:07:21
a soggy pair of clogs and some Branston pickle. Given these clues, Beryl deduced that the man died from a severeEntry ID: 197
Author: Stemily
Date & Time: 2006-03-08 17:30:29
head injury from a proponent of the ancient Yorkshire martial art of Cheese and Pickle Ninja Storm. The cult of CPNS were renowned for their strange ritualsEntry ID: 198
Author: Gobber the Belch
Date & Time: 2006-03-08 19:34:30
involving a jar of Branston, a lump of stilton and a set of polished nunchucks. Few dwarfs passed the initiation, as theEntry ID: 199
Author: Sheep Worrier
Date & Time: 2006-03-08 20:46:35
rules stipulated a height restriction of 1.4 meters and taller. The dejected dwarfs (and midgets for PC sake) went on a riotous rampage, burningEntry ID: 200
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-03-09 12:20:24
anything they could reach - small dogs, the homeless, other dwarves etc. The police had a tough time catching the little folk as they had oiled themselves withEntry ID: 201
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-09 18:45:22
a concoction made from distilled Yak milk and nasal scrapings from a small herbivore (preferably a hedgehog). This enabled our height challenged heroes to goEntry ID: 202
Author: Aunt Hefty Thighs
Date & Time: 2006-03-09 21:31:32
skiing without the fear of being mocked for their diminutive stature, nor being charged an excessive amount of money forEntry ID: 203
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-09 22:32:00
extra small clogs. Having suffered this indignity one too many times, they formed their own unionEntry ID: 204
Author: Crab
Date & Time: 2006-03-09 23:03:41
of states and declared war on the British. However,this did not rouse the British from there tea drinking as they had always considered it a God forsaken placeEntry ID: 205
Author: girlie bob
Date & Time: 2006-03-10 22:01:21
and they certainly like their tea. Still, they had to set an example so theyEntry ID: 206
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-13 19:24:13
put out a "wanted" poster to try and catch Texas Pete. He'd been wreaking havoc throughout the land in the search of his arch nemesisEntry ID: 207
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-13 22:31:05
Mr Jangu, a man/horse/fish creature with spikey horns and a green fur coat made from a giant mink. He decided to poster near pubs and brothels as this was whereEntry ID: 208
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-14 21:18:24
he was most likely to meet fellow members of the Salvation Army who were likely to be saving these unfortunate souls. Although as a Manohypofishogriif he oftenEntry ID: 209
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-03-15 21:24:16
wondered why he had a disease that had a silly long name that told him nothing about his condition. But, fortunately for us, he was still able to play theEntry ID: 211
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-16 19:05:13
Kazoo. People would travel hundreds of miles to listen to Dr Forbes play beautiful music with his band -Ned on Spoons and Ted on the Triangle. They were calledEntry ID: 212
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-17 09:29:11
The Magical Lonely, and they were the premium european hip-hop/heavy metal band of the 19th century. Their exclusiveEntry ID: 213
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-17 16:57:21
brand of music combined with massive on stage caged animals scared most folk, but for only £3.57 it was a bargain thatEntry ID: 214
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-17 18:35:10
couldn't be missed. Unfortunately, it was the night Roy was mauled by one of his tigers. Siegfried found the whole situation hilarious, untilEntry ID: 215
Author: Grace
Date & Time: 2006-03-17 20:00:55
his heavily sequinned lederhosen inexplicably caught the beam from a laser light and created an infinite improbability matrix and fried his Teutonic bouffant. TEntry ID: 216
Author: Dante
Date & Time: 2006-03-18 16:06:35
S Elliot was cheering the whole time, he tended to like the shows that were put on by Dr Forbes and his band and always liked to see tiger maulings. His newEntry ID: 217
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-18 18:38:56
wooden leg, however, was starting to itch and so he had to leave during the interval. He was depressed as he had missed the bit where the tiger usually slowlyEntry ID: 218
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-18 20:00:33
gobbles up the beautiful damsel in distress and takes a long walk off a short cliff. Oh well, maybe next timeEntry ID: 219
Author: Sarah
Date & Time: 2006-03-18 20:32:40
he'll look where he's going. It was as he was tumbling toward the razor sharp rocks, at the bottom of the cliff, when it suddenly dawned upon him thatEntry ID: 220
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-19 20:13:13
by mixing the moonshine from his hip flask with the gun powder from his shotgun shells, that he could make a propellant to control his descent and possiblyEntry ID: 221
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-19 21:41:33
not shatter his leg bones into tiny pieces. Instead he only got minor cuts, breaks and bruises from theEntry ID: 222
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-20 18:11:37
sack of metal ingots that landed on him, that he had been carrying as he fell off of the cliff edge. But he could still walk away so he considered himselfEntry ID: 223
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-20 21:10:00
one of us! As he was first down the cliff he sat down on a rock and ate his tomato and limpet sandwich he had secreted in folds of his cape. During his luncheonEntry ID: 224
Author: my name is earl
Date & Time: 2006-03-20 21:17:29
he managed to contract food poisoning but that didn't stop his escapades, in fact it made him even more determined to enter this years Great Outdoor Fight whicEntry ID: 225
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-20 21:26:57
h was sponsored by Jim Bowen. He'd always been proud to donate money to the event ever since being crowned five times Great Outdoor Fight champ. The first ruleEntry ID: 226
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-20 22:31:38
is the set up. Three acres, three days, three thousand men. This impressive event claims many lives each year, and people are often renderedEntry ID: 227
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 01:56:13
spleenless during the mammoth event. Another hundred or so are often killed inside tents by clowns with bowler hatsEntry ID: 228
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 02:00:59
and kung fu fighting midgets. The event went down in history as the funniest mass slaughter ever recorded. Dr. Forbes gave up saving the maimed survivors as heEntry ID: 229
Author: MiracleMaxx
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 08:12:45
was 6,000 miles away exploring the lost city of the Incas. He was feeling particularly pleased with himself that day as many local peasants had commentedEntry ID: 230
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 09:12:14
on his new tie he had purchased from Top Shop. It cost him an arm and a leg too, which explained the hobble,Entry ID: 231
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 18:52:41
and his inability to tie his own tie. He had to have his mother tie it for him but that stopped when she lost most of her fingers down the sink. So he now hadEntry ID: 232
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 21:09:33
to ask the village tie elder to perform the summoning of The Mighty Voldan, demon of neck apparel, to come forth and provide him with the gift. He would thus haveEntry ID: 233
Author: Gobber the Belch
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 21:40:06
the power to not only tie his tie, but he gained the abilty to talk with the squirrels as they make ties out of other squirrels and sell them to the tourists ofEntry ID: 234
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 22:07:44
Bolton. The squirrels found it hard to understand his use of the archaic form of the squirrel language - invented by the red squirrels of britain before theyEntry ID: 235
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 22:35:25
had to hide from the grey ones, some say they get eaten by them, the truth on the other hand is much much worse. instead theyEntry ID: 236
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 22:39:21
they were abducted for secret experiments and were probed heavily. The results were a freak kind of were-squirrel with a voracious appetite forEntry ID: 237
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 22:49:39
backed beans and chilli kebabs. Although attempts to hide them in the winter months tended to end withEntry ID: 238
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 22:51:52
disaster as the rare kind of "Backed Beans" were hard to come by. They solved the problem by making them in to baked beans and stored them in cans. This had aEntry ID: 239
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 22:59:39
massive effect on the employment of John Thwiggins who was employed to label the "Backed Beans", but being a bit mentaly challenged could not spell backed soEntry ID: 240
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 23:03:49
he went to Korea to futher his career. This too, was due to his lack of coherent spelling. Still at least heEntry ID: 241
Author: An Erotic Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 23:05:43
didn't need any spam for he made his own out of roadkill and his own nail clippings, hair and bits of skin. Most people found his spam to be quiteEntry ID: 242
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 23:11:44
erotic. People from Russia used it in the winter as a primitive lubricant which aides entrance and attractsEntry ID: 243
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-21 23:17:55
much admiration from their soviet neighbours, all of whom were working on their own machine bearing lubricants for use on stiff jointedEntry ID: 244
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-22 08:21:17
Belgian Oak doors. The Russians loved the Belgian style of free form Jazz whichEntry ID: 245
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-22 17:20:09
was so boring it helped them sleep at night. It's dull, monotonous droning also made the local batsEntry ID: 246
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-22 19:45:40
melancholic. They turned to counsellors and self help groups to overcome the extreme sadness the whirring evoked. Dr Forbes set up a special program toEntry ID: 247
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-22 20:13:00
make happy happy juices to sell on the black market, well Ebay anyway. The bids came in fast asEntry ID: 248
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-22 22:59:44
people will buy anything from the internet. Dead mice, rotten fruit, etc. That's because most people are stupid and need a goodEntry ID: 249
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-22 23:25:35
pair of rodent slippers and a mouldy kumquat. I once saved the internet to a floppy disk using a brilliant compression algorithm known asEntry ID: 250
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-22 23:53:46
Sleeching. It would have made me millions but it fell out of my pocket one night as i vomited up 9 pints ofEntry ID: 251
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 00:01:50
wallpaper paste. I had been ingesting wallpaper paste because I had heard that it gives the ability to climb walls like Spiderman. But I think I overdid it.Entry ID: 252
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 01:31:53
By the same token, eating 10 packs of super noodles should transform a person into superman. Wonder woman obtained her powers byEntry ID: 253
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 09:28:06
ordering them off an Internet website. The costume came free, with the treatment but there were some unfortunate side effects such asEntry ID: 254
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 18:00:00
only being able to speak in Guatemalan. This is because the previous owner was Edwardo the Snake Rangler. Whilst he had hoped to be a charmer, he had learnt hisEntry ID: 255
Author: Gobber the Belch1
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 18:58:32
trade at a local Dixons which, as you can imagine, did not set him up well for the world of angry snakes in bags. He oftenEntry ID: 256
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 19:36:28
shaved his eyebrows to help him in his attempts, until someone pointed out to him that this wouldn't make any difference. Snake wrangling was still a better joEntry ID: 257
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 20:25:21
b than Estate Agent, although both involve slimey cold blooded reptiles. It was whilst standing at the train station, on a dreary cold winter's day that sheEntry ID: 258
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 20:52:58
had her first encounter with a oozing green eel. It slithered up her and bit deep into her shoulder. It hung on for two years, surviving by drinking herEntry ID: 259
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 22:23:55
blood which contained a high proportion of monosodium glutamate, which was rather odd. Still, it helped them both with regards to theirEntry ID: 260
Author: An Eclectic Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 22:34:26
bowel movements. It became clear that this was no ordinary problem and a cure had to be found. It was decided that Dr.Entry ID: 261
Author: Stemily
Date & Time: 2006-03-23 23:28:39
Pepper would do the trick; a can of that sugary goodness was bound to get his digestion back on track. So they embarked on an epic quest to find theEntry ID: 262
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-24 09:30:37
local corner shop. Once in there they encountered an unusual bespectacled midget named Stumpy and a well endowed lady named Scarface. Both were annoyed at StuartEntry ID: 263
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-24 17:56:50
for getting his willy out instead of the money needed for the purchases. Needless to say the police were called and Stuart was locked up for 10 years 3 months andEntry ID: 264
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-24 19:16:21
given a stern telling off. At least he learnt his lesson and never again tried this method of payment (until it was introduced as legal tender in 2059). The oneEntry ID: 265
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-24 23:50:07
two three sheep was Stuart's special friend that only he could see. He found him whilst in solitary confinement for the aforementioned crimes. This bizzareEntry ID: 266
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-25 19:07:46
friendship started when they bumped into each other whilst digging out of Shazbang-a-bang prison for the persistant willy exposers. They were in a tunnel thatEntry ID: 267
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-25 20:33:33
had taken 3 years to construct. As they were making their escape, one of the wooden struts snapped. With lighting quick reactions, one of the exposers used hisEntry ID: 268
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-25 23:31:21
tonsils to keep the tunnel open. This was extremely unusual for St. Cristoban to see. He had an episode, one of the ones that'd become infamous forEntry ID: 269
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-26 00:01:31
after that one incident with the bishop. It is probably wise not to go into all the details, suffice to say he had earned a reputation for being a littleEntry ID: 270
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-26 17:53:17
too fond of bashing the bishop during services. Meanwhile in walked the biggest Leprechaun I had ever seen, he was also dark, I don't mean dark skinned, it wasEntry ID: 271
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-03-26 18:08:50
just, well yes I do mean he was dark. He was the world's only black Leprechaun. He had an afro and played the slap bass like you wouldn't believe! Funky MacEntry ID: 272
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-26 23:22:54
Stereotype was his name - straight from the mean streets of Dublin. He still exhibited a fine ginger beard, although being a man of taste he refused to wear theEntry ID: 273
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 08:04:00
emerald green suit but preferred one incorporating the colours of a practising Rastafarian. He also substituted the Guinness for a little Ganja which lead toEntry ID: 274
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 12:42:14
his Leprechaun status being revoked. A ginger beard and lack of height do not a Leprechaun make. He became so despondant after this that heEntry ID: 275
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 17:26:36
turned to the ways of the Funk. He studied for many a year whilst backstage at Parliament gigs. Once he had fine tuned his funky stature he set sail forEntry ID: 276
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 17:58:46
Papa New Guinea. He had a package that he had stowed there and needed to retrieve it. The package consisted of an electric saxophone and a largeEntry ID: 277
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 18:16:14
assortment of Right Said Fred LPs (well, three actually). As he was broke, he intended to reach Papa New Guinea using a raft that he'd made out of oldEntry ID: 278
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 18:21:53
sponge cake! Not the best material to use, but he thought if he got hungry along the way he could always take a quick nibbleEntry ID: 279
Author: Sarah
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 18:36:52
. He passed the long months at sea by blasting out funky riffs on his bass, and it was during this time he wrote and recorded his first album calledEntry ID: 280
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-27 21:18:58
the "Best Funk Album in the World ... Ever! Volume I". This title was rather presumptious and contradictory, nevertheless he went on to produce five more albumEntry ID: 281
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-28 12:11:07
s before he lost a hand in a tram accident. After this he vowed to further research into robotic hands and so heEntry ID: 282
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-28 14:08:34
embarked upon a quest towards Japan where robotic gizmos are in no short supply. He was too tired to look properly so he used an Aibo as his new handEntry ID: 283
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-28 17:37:31
which, in hindsight, he realised was a huge mistake. A small robotic dog makes a poor hand substitute. Still, at least he still had hisEntry ID: 284
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-28 19:16:04
pet echidna Alfonso to help out around the house. Alfonso made a very good au-pair substitute apart from forming a rather unnatural attachment to Dr Forbes'Entry ID: 285
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-03-28 21:11:13
winkle collection. Those little shellfish captivated Alfonso in a way which meant that he could no longer paint portraits of the beautiful Mrs. Jones who wasEntry ID: 286
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-28 21:54:59
nude and in a bath full of hot, steamy, shimmering custard. She was trying to get Alfonso's attention, but the damn shellfish were riding bikes in bikinis agaiEntry ID: 287
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-03-29 21:11:12
nst the current and were having one hell of a time doing so. Even nude women bathing in custard can't compete with that. So it was decided to have AlfonsoEntry ID: 288
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-03-29 21:23:53
crowned as King Alfonso of Denmark. As you can't have too much of a good thing, his first royal decree ordered all Danish chicks to bathe in custard anyway. Plop!Entry ID: 289
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-03-29 23:07:58
Was the sound made by a small child when he witnessed that his new king was an echidna. He found it rather remarkable thatEntry ID: 290
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-03-31 02:42:14
a Scandinavian nation would really wish to place their future in the claws of an Antipodean egg laying marsupial. Still he couldn't be worse than the electricEntry ID: 291
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-04-02 11:10:55
salmon that ruled over large parts of Africa before being eaten accidently during a revolt. Still at leastEntry ID: 292
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-02 16:14:21
the Marquis de Zambia was not eaten, he was the king's main man although he was a giraffe. However he was set on fire in an unfortunateEntry ID: 293
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-02 18:02:03
forrest fire caused by a rampage of burning hell maggots. It was a spectacle to behold indeed. The Earl of Lincolnshire flew past in his Gopod just asEntry ID: 294
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-04-02 20:58:42
the fire finished. He was too late, but he did pick up a lot of speeding tickets in his Gopod. He could'nt pay them so had to spend 57years in prison withEntry ID: 295
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-02 21:29:53
the Marquis de Brighton. They engaged in daily bouts of chin wrestling which was a very dangerous act banned in several counties. But the guards bet on theEntry ID: 296
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-02 21:34:10
event nonetheless. As much as several hundred groats, five chickens and an echidna have exchanged hands in a single chin bout. Famously, the Marquess had aEntry ID: 297
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-03 11:41:47
convicted for racketeering having been the crime lord known as the Crimson Chin. He had in fact been brought to justice by Hairy Scary Librarian who had a largeEntry ID: 298
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-04-03 19:03:14
member (cough) of parliment perched upon his shoulder. So as he was perusing his library he happened across the Crimson Chin, initially alarmed he hid butEntry ID: 299
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-03 19:12:13
ter down his underpants. Clever, but this didn't thwart the Crimson Chin. Quick as a flash, the chinster noticed his odd behaviour and chinned the hapless MP offEntry ID: 300
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-04 11:32:45
, who then squealed like a burning fairy. This drew Crimson Chins attention, and while he was distracted the librarian sucker punched him in his weak spot;Entry ID: 301
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-04-04 19:32:39
his third eye. The chinmeister fell to floor in agony. He had now lost all sense of 4D space in time and everything looked horriblyEntry ID: 302
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-06 13:41:51
pink and fluffy! It seemed that the world around him had shifted into another dimension, one whereEntry ID: 303
Author: Sarah
Date & Time: 2006-04-06 15:40:16
electric weasels jetted through the sky, and colours weaved around randomly as if in a LSD induced hallucination. This rather bizzare change in fortunes hadEntry ID: 304
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-06 17:35:23
been caused through mixing Absinthe with a particularly ripe Camembert. In fact electric weasels should never mix cheese with alcohol as it always ends with inEntry ID: 305
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-04-07 18:51:12
coherent squeaking and a hoe down. This particular form of dancing is the mating ritual of the electric weasel and nearly always ends up withEntry ID: 306
Author: stemily2k
Date & Time: 2006-04-07 19:29:59
a small child being injured or a large hag fish being cooked. Electric weasels are very careless about collateral damage caused by their mating rites andEntry ID: 307
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-07 21:07:54
live in shoes over christmas becauseEntry ID: 308
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 01:06:56
all the inns are full. As everyone is aware, the holy trinity consists of the Electric, Erotic and Eclectic Jesus. However, there is an intense rivalry betweenEntry ID: 309
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 10:51:48
the sleeches and the Jesii. It was the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny. However, sleeches are poorly equiped in the department ofEntry ID: 310
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 19:02:10
getting up in the morning. They are also alcoholics and so they prefer hoedowns to showdowns, or maybe hoedown showdowns. But as long as there is booze theyEntry ID: 311
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 21:52:07
will be found nearby in a hole or maybe a ditch. But anyway,Entry ID: 312
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 21:53:35
the point is, if you're out searching for Jesus, or one of his henchmen, try following the star of Bethlehem. However, never, ever, ever show yourEntry ID: 313
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 22:05:02
rusty sheriffs badge as this can cause offense to Jesus and he will go biblical on you. You have been warned. Still it's ok to show him yourEntry ID: 314
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 22:18:48
lepers boobs. When this happens Jesus fondles them better, well thats what I am told. The point is dont piss him off he has a very bad temper, I mean so wouldEntry ID: 315
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-08 22:36:11
you like to go out on a date with me? I like long walks at sunset, cute little puppy dogs and rainbows. xxx. However I am scared of the colour green and I don'tEntry ID: 316
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-04-09 18:12:33
regret murdering my entire family. Not the best advertisement ever written in a lonely hearts ad, but it worked nonetheless. On opening the door the next morningEntry ID: 317
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-09 19:52:49
after placing the ad I fell over the line of attractive ladies who had camped outside. It was like an earthquake disaster area, in an entirely female village. SomeEntry ID: 318
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-10 01:11:14
of the lovely ladies were sporting this years lastest fashion accessory; a packet of crisps duct-taped to the side of their faces. This did serve toEntry ID: 319
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-10 18:33:50
attract thousands of vultures which proceded to peck at the ladies faces. Being the gentleman I am I quickly sprung into action, I grabbed my handy whip andEntry ID: 320
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-11 00:41:22
struck at the vultures with great venom. At a rate of fifty birds per minute, I cleared the sky of the baldy birds and proceeded toEntry ID: 321
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-11 09:51:48
howl with the taste of victory. I was later asked to instruct Indiana Jones on my technique. So, back to the lovely ladies and their eagerness toEntry ID: 322
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-11 19:44:53
lick clean my garden path. Not wanting to displease them I set them up, big ones at the back, small at the front, sat back in my rocking chair and watched themEntry ID: 323
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-11 21:52:03
unfortunately it was a frosty morning and their tongues stuck to the path. As it happens this was a god send becauseEntry ID: 324
Author: stemily1
Date & Time: 2006-04-11 22:30:44
I was in need of somewhere to park my bike, and their exposed crevices filled the gap (so to speak). It was whilst heading toward a set of exposed buttocks thatEntry ID: 325
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-11 23:07:38
I noticed they were holding a lightly buttered crumpet which could only mean that I had stumbled upon a 'fagging' ritual from Tom Browns schooldays. I therefoEntry ID: 326
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-04-12 15:13:47
re had a bit of crumpet and proceeded to clean my own garden path with a broom. This was inconvenient because I was planning to go toEntry ID: 327
Author: Stemily2
Date & Time: 2006-04-12 19:33:24
bogganing down the glacial slopes of Zeelich - a two layered planet with four different races. The workers toil in the undergas, whilst the eliteEntry ID: 328
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-12 20:07:30
sit in thier log cabbins sipping drinks with a high alcoholic content and, obviously, with large quantities of ice in them. The planet was located at the end ofEntry ID: 329
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-12 20:15:49
a small dog. I can't recall the dog's name but I certainly remember it being hairy and rude to passing strangers. Still, this has nothing to do withEntry ID: 330
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-12 22:43:49
finding the correct temperature to heat my sex wax to before applying it to my surf board. I really needed to get I right this time as on the previous occasionEntry ID: 331
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-04-14 22:04:38
I accidentally slipped my board into a very distraught young baboon. He was not pleased. In fact he even attempted to clawEntry ID: 332
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-04-15 17:48:26
my face off in a fit of surfboard induced madness. He missed as he was a blind baboon called Stevie, good pianist though. I did need to hit the waves thoughEntry ID: 333
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-15 17:58:18
, so I strapped the board to my Gopod, set the fusion engines to maximum power and reached the shores of Clacton-On-Sea in 2.3 seconds. Unfortunately, I'd leftEntry ID: 334
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-16 10:45:51
my basil at home. How could I surf when I didn't have any herbs? This was a crazy situation that perplexed me deeply, until I realised that I could hunt for poEntry ID: 335
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-16 18:22:14
lo's which I could then use to attract the Basil man with. It was a genius plan which could not fail. I grabbed my machine gun and a bag of C4 and started toEntry ID: 336
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-18 20:48:02
boogie. After I'd finished, I went in search of the Basil man - who was thought to originate from a planet other than our own. As an advanced life-formEntry ID: 337
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-18 21:55:55
with a penchant for goat lactose. This meant he never travelled beyond the Midlands as the majority of people in the North have never had a goats cheese rouladeEntry ID: 338
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-04-19 12:33:49
because northerners are savvy and know what tastes right proper good our lad. So I headed south to find the enigmatic basil man who was also rumored toEntry ID: 339
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-20 15:56:08
be dead. Well if he was it would be a short search, and maybe I could find a nice goth girl in a cemetery in Bognor Regis at the same time. I decided to put onEntry ID: 340
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-20 16:53:23
my hydraulic exoskeleton and tucked myself up in bed. That night I dreamt ofEntry ID: 341
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-20 17:22:42
purple turtles screaming at a man named Marshall. I believe he was a Cambridge City FC goalie and was very frightened of those amphibious creatures. My exoEntry ID: 342
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-20 17:34:28
rbitant wage demands had cut my own football career short. I had once been the goalie for Fulchester Utd but lost out to Billie the Fish when my agent demandedEntry ID: 343
Author: wolverine
Date & Time: 2006-04-20 21:15:53
that I should be supplied a slice of orange at halftime. This sent the chairman into a fit of rage - he picked up my agent and carried himEntry ID: 344
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-20 21:35:34
to the moon on the back of an interstellar pegasus. This was indeed a strange sight for my eyes to behold. I nearly had a hysterectomy because of it. Well ponEntry ID: 345
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-21 15:29:15
derous thoughts upon that subject. Anyhoo, back to the interstellar pegasus. It had recently become the most popular way to travel to the moon by a general voteEntry ID: 346
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-04-25 12:51:44
of people who eat Mars bars. It may be slower than other transport systems but what it lacks in spped it gains inEntry ID: 347
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-25 15:53:07
onboard entertainment. It boasts six plasma screen T.V's and full Dolby surround sound. This is a good trade-off for its lack of s.p.p.e.d. which is an acronymEntry ID: 348
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-26 15:30:00
for Semi Permanent Pulsed Electronic Drolvey. A drolve for those of you not familiar to space travell is in fact a type of manoeuvre used in order avoidEntry ID: 349
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-04-26 18:47:43
hitting an asteroid - or Jupiter. The inventor of the "drolve" was a Dr T J Forbes of the planet Grrr. Grrr was famous for its delightfulEntry ID: 350
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-04-27 12:01:35
Turkish Three Step dance which was widely celebrated as being one of the silliest dances ever to be invented. Still, Dr Forbes enjoyed the annual events forEntry ID: 351
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-04-27 16:26:59
it was these times when he remembered that he was never any good at dancing and he should stick to what he was good at. Driving cattle with aEntry ID: 352
Author: stemily3
Date & Time: 2006-04-28 00:44:08
a taste for the 'wild side' to Las Vegas on the back of his Harley. He undertook this service as the US currently frowns on Cattle driving motorcycles but doesEntry ID: 353
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-04-30 20:09:36
let its Citizens drive them dispite having lower IQ's than the cattle. The cattle, therefore, were beginning to revoltEntry ID: 354
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-01 00:57:12
and indeed formed their own militia. Although not allowed to ride motorcycles they were allowed to carry guns and drink strong liquor which led to them beingEntry ID: 355
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-05-01 20:46:11
involved in a shootout with the local Sheriff and his band of inbred deputies. The skirmish led to two people being killed and all of the cows ending up asEntry ID: 356
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-02 14:46:19
processed cheese. The new ray gun that turns cows into cheese had been a sucsess. Now all that was needed was to turn them into a first rate chedder and theEntry ID: 357
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-02 15:16:49
cheesy revolution would be complete. With the ray gun lodged between her hoof (somehow), and a skip in her step, Molly, the deranged Jersey cow set aboutEntry ID: 358
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-05-02 16:51:32
eating grass. This was unusual for Molly because it was a tuesday and...Entry ID: 359
Author: Stemily
Date & Time: 2006-05-02 18:26:40
She normally only ate class A drugs on Tuesdays. Still, it enabled her to relax sufficiently to engage the applied triviality engine of her orgasmotron andEntry ID: 360
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-05-02 20:55:34
sip on a few cool beers. She really loved her beer and she brewed it herself in one of her stomachs. It was siphoned out of her and sent to the bottling plantEntry ID: 361
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-03 13:37:29
on her back. She would roam the country giving out free beer to anyone who needed it. she had caused many binge drinking sessions but sheEntry ID: 362
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-06 14:00:52
was still fondly looked uopn because hey, who dosen't want free beer? Free is my favourite flavour as I demonstrated to great effect during the 1956Entry ID: 363
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-08 12:42:26
grad beer festival where I managed to wrangle over two hundred and four (204.76) free beers in three days. This was quite an accomplishment though it did ratherEntry ID: 364
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-05-08 12:46:50
leave me a tad pickled. I looked a little like a disheveled california raisin. This turned out to be quite convenient becauseEntry ID: 365
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-08 12:51:29
I was auditioning for a part in a new stairlift ad as a replacement for the late Thora Hird. The ad would end with Compo rolling down a hill in aEntry ID: 366
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-05-09 07:10:08
state of complete nakedness except for a gimp mask. This is because stair lifts were now one of the preferred devices amongst practising sadomasochists and weEntry ID: 367
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-05-09 12:12:31
t otters. The otters like the stair lift as they provide easy access down steep river banks. Still, Compo was rolling down the hill in a basket of live eelsEntry ID: 368
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-10 13:28:56
and jelly. Some cockney jerk would pay for this he was thinking, but as he planned his revenge he hit a tree and the basket explodedEntry ID: 369
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-10 13:32:15
in a shower of slimy aquatic creatures and gelatinous goo. This wasn't the best start to the day that he recieved his O.B.E. How could he face the Queen like tEntry ID: 370
Author: e Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-10 15:25:36
his? She would have him beaten by one of her frozen Corgi's that she had made for such an occassion. Still he could lick the jelly off hisEntry ID: 371
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-11 00:20:12
host but in most countries this is considered very presumptuous and down right rude. Still many Queens enjoy this more than Abba songs and in some cases theyEntry ID: 372
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-05-11 13:59:02
spontaneously combust if they don't get their daily fix. Elton John was one such Queen, in particular, he insisted thatEntry ID: 373
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-05-12 08:58:36
he was licked by a small boy at nine every evening and a large giraffe at eleven every morning. This had become so routine for him thatEntry ID: 374
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-12 15:45:09
he no longer came out in a rash from touching them. He used to like getting the rash it was likeEntry ID: 375
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-14 15:21:21
the good old days when they would rub thier proboscises into a crop of nettles or a hive of hungry bees. These days, you were lucky if you even managedEntry ID: 376
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-05-14 21:56:17
to call a paper bag in a septic tank 'Home'. Still, it was better than being on the Pirate Training Program were death was a distinct possibility and you onlyEntry ID: 377
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-05-15 16:11:22
got one pint of grog per day. So I left the P.T.P. Academy and set sail for northern Mexico, where I heard pirate training was much more hands on. TheyEntry ID: 378
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-16 12:12:42
regularly buckled their swashes and specialised in frightening foreigners. I was particularly looking forward to my favourite piratical activity of ‘wenching’Entry ID: 379
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-05-16 19:30:05
the Grandma. It was the new pirate craze that had taken the seven seas by storm. That and parrot baitingEntry ID: 380
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-18 00:44:15
which had been outlawed two-hundred years ago because it had seriously depleted the natural resource of pirate parrots, this was why there were few pirates leftEntry ID: 381
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-18 14:46:21
as their completely symbiotic relationship meant when the parrot died the pirates where left in emotional and mental turmoil causing them to walk the plank withEntry ID: 382
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-05-18 20:48:03
out first ensuring the safety rails were deployed. Many a careless pirate met a grisly end this way. One such pirate was the legendaryEntry ID: 383
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-05-18 22:15:49
Armpit Pete who wore lead boots and was insane. Dispite this he was feared by many due to his bizzare battle tactics whichEntry ID: 384
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-19 00:58:24
required pirate to strip naked and rub themselves down with a small stoat while roaring like an over excitedEntry ID: 385
Author: fat bob
Date & Time: 2006-05-20 14:39:36
prostitute. This ensured that the pirates had the advantage of suprise, their enemies were all to shocked to remember to defend themselves. Armpit Pete wasn'tEntry ID: 386
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-21 14:28:48
Any relation to Texas Pete the arch enemy of eighties animated character Superted but he did have a fondness for wearing 'chaps' and a large handlebarEntry ID: 387
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-05-26 19:35:51
moustache. It was only on closer examination that Texas Pete noticed his skin was missing. That explained the odd looks he got as he skipped the light fandangoEntry ID: 388
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-05-27 02:39:35
in Armpit Pete's brigg. He had been put there as Armpit Pete was annoyed with people mistaking him for Texas Pete's brother. This mad him very angryEntry ID: 389
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-27 19:32:19
so one day he decided to go to the face transplant clinic, the only problem was he couldn't decide whether to go for John Travolta or Nicholas Cage. EventuallyEntry ID: 390
Author: Stemily
Date & Time: 2006-05-28 14:09:54
They said "No more drugs, for that man!" and ejected him from the clinic. He decided to go and drown his sorrows inEntry ID: 391
Author: The Master Sleech
Date & Time: 2006-05-29 00:21:46
in a sack which he threw into the local canal. Taking his £25 from the sperm donor clinic he set off for a night of gambling on the homing chicken races andEntry ID: 392
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-05-29 20:51:47
inhaling pepper spray. The chickens all lost and all bets were off however because they had been craftily intercepted by Colonel Sanders in his GopodEntry ID: 393
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-05-30 16:12:13
of doom, the pepper spray actually reacted with the chicks allowing them to fly! And fly they did, into the sunset, to find a land of solely of vegetarians andEntry ID: 394
Author: HelsBels1
Date & Time: 2006-05-30 18:27:00
a strange species of animal which obtained sustenance by licking rocks. The locals called these animalsEntry ID: 395
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-05-31 19:44:30
Sting and Mrs Sting as the tended to engage in mammoth sessions of tantric sex whilst yodelling the entire sound track of Desperado. They also gave mysticEntry ID: 396
Author: fat bob
Date & Time: 2006-05-31 20:47:35
meg an unsharpened pencil, which she used to fill out a form for unemployment benefit. She sits at home eating ice-cream and flicking herself off to TrishaEntry ID: 397
Author: modern drunkard magazine
Date & Time: 2006-06-02 16:48:05
Goddard, whom she admired a great deal. Her patronising tone, and condescending attitude made her feelEntry ID: 398
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-06-02 23:42:22
like the littlest hobo. Which was to say, she felt like a tiny, dirty tramp with no prospects. She liked Trisha because she had Stockholm Syndrome from when sheEntry ID: 399
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-06-05 16:35:38
was kidnapped by a partisan group who's main objective is to reform the continents into one giant landmass and declare turnips as the national vegetable. BunioEntry ID: 400
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-06-07 10:07:53
ns prevented them from actually doing anything about it as their feet were much too sore to leave the house. They were thus scouring Ebay for enough cheap SegwaysEntry ID: 401
Author: fat bob
Date & Time: 2006-06-08 04:16:46
proved fruitless because Segways are stupid and expensive and can be built at home for a fraction of the price, as can self-balncing, motorized uni-cyclesEntry ID: 402
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-06-08 12:38:48
with psychotic cyborg clowns attached to them. It is imperative to ensure that cyborg clowns ride on *self-balancing* uni-cylcles because otherwiseEntry ID: 403
Author: cirrus
Date & Time: 2006-06-08 16:31:21
they become ecstatically happy. Eventually, the clowns are so cheerful, they are unable to perform their jobs - which is too scare the crap out of everybody andEntry ID: 404
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-06-08 22:22:59
perform the bizarre rituals of Morris dancing. To a large extent his appears to be done by becoming an accountant, growing a beard, and insisting on extollingEntry ID: 405
Author: fat bob
Date & Time: 2006-06-09 04:55:10
the virtues of strapping jingle bells to your socks and waving hankies at other grown men in a camp, limp-wristed manner. Still, it beatsEntry ID: 406
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-06-13 12:44:46
playing Sudoku, or watching that inane, annoying Frosties advert. Still, at least my potato farm had taken off with help from the good Dr. ForbesEntry ID: 407
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-06-14 13:08:45
who certainly knows how to handle his spuds. Life on the farm was not all romps in the hayloft it had a much more sinister element since the appearance ofEntry ID: 408
Author: Bombay Duck
Date & Time: 2006-06-15 02:02:25
"The Spaniel" who was a columbian assassin working for The Crimson Chin. Why he appeared at my tater farm I shall never know, but he was to forever change theEntry ID: 409
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-06-23 11:55:59
way in which potatoes were cultivated & harvested. His revolutionary methods were deemed by some to be too perverse, too extreme, but they produced results. ForEntry ID: 410
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-06-25 10:55:42
tified by this knowledge he was able to set out on his pilgrimage to deepest darkest Lancashire in search of the secret sect of Cheese and Pickle Ninja Storm whEntry ID: 412
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-06-25 14:34:17
..en all of a sudden, he was attacked by Master Bob (bob@bob.com) Last known 'Eke thump' practitioner. With a thwack he hit Dr Forbes, who died.(RIP) Bob crieEntry ID: 413
Author: MoJoker
Date & Time: 2006-06-26 12:36:45
d the big girly boo hoo and thus invoked the sympathy of the Great Metaphysical Primate who brought our beloved Dr Forbes back to life. However, the good Dr wasEntry ID: 414
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-07-03 10:12:37
forever changed. For he had grown a rather large handlebar moustache and had become magnetic. Still, this wan't much of a problem sinceEntry ID: 415
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-07-07 14:22:49
he had moved to the dark side of the moon where the surface was made entirely of tasty cheese. The Clangers welcomed the good doctor by introducing him toEntry ID: 416
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-07-07 15:42:51
a series of unattached extra terrestrials. It was the speed dating service of ET-Reunited the intergalactic lonely heart-like-organ service and he met a volupEntry ID: 419
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-07-10 15:53:26
on a headstart course. where there wereEntry ID: 420
Author: headstart
Date & Time: 2006-07-13 19:38:46
a group of aliens looking forEntry ID: 421
Author: prospecter
Date & Time: 2006-07-13 21:49:41
The meaning of life foundEntry ID: 422
Author: Headstart1
Date & Time: 2006-07-14 16:07:20
it at the bottom of his pint glass. He turned to his marsupial master and uttered the following sentiment, which has since entered into folklore "He whoEntry ID: 423
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-07-14 18:29:28
can prostrate himself as flat as a lizard drinkin is worthy to call himself a friend of the Brigade of the Purple Platypus. However, this was a rather obliqueEntry ID: 424
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-07-17 16:44:02
quest, as the Brigade had drowned several months earlier off the coast of Nigeria. Their cries were heard throughout the parallel universe, but nothing couldEntry ID: 425
Author: BrettBlade
Date & Time: 2006-07-18 22:36:49
save their sorry souls from their terrible fate. All 63 members of the Brigade were lost in this terrible accident. One said that they should have consideredEntry ID: 426
Author: Challenged
Date & Time: 2006-07-18 22:37:59
life jackets, but that would have cost a considerable amount of money. An amount that the brigade didn't have. Money saves lives, remember that.Entry ID: 427
Author: BrettBlade
Date & Time: 2006-07-18 22:39:43
Had they paid closer attention to their feet they would have noticed they were webbed as Platypuses can swim! Thus averting the need for life jackets, still youEntry ID: 428
Author: Valhalarama
Date & Time: 2006-07-19 20:56:16
cannot pass. Oddly enough, there was a brief musical interlude at this point and people stopped for snacks and a refreshing beverage. Afterwards, things resumedEntry ID: 429
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-07-20 11:09:53
in a way similar to how the French engaged the Germans, by trying not to trip over their discarded rifles as they fled. Of course, these were troubling times soEntry ID: 430
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-07-25 13:53:02
best not to dwell on past misdemeanours and continue plundering the South Seas in search of the Treasure of Norbet Thompson the gayest privateer ever to stepEntry ID: 431
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-08-04 12:07:23
out of the closet. Obviously, Norbet's sexuallity led to much innuendo amongst the crew. For example, walking Norbet's plank took on a whole new meaning, as dEntry ID: 432
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-08-04 13:20:51
id 'burying the treasure' and a 'flogging by the Boson'. Still Norbert was not the only gay pirate and he was no where near a camp as Lavender Beard or Phil theEntry ID: 433
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-08-04 13:57:49
Queer. It wasn't the most imaginitive name but pirates are commonly too drunk to spend too much time thinking up names. They drink like men ought to and don'tEntry ID: 434
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-08-09 19:06:45
stop until someone loses and eye, hence the number of eye patches evident amongst privateers. There is no standard method in which the eye is lost but some ofEntry ID: 435
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-08-10 13:08:38
the pirates become irate at any rate. One pirate ate his eye with some fava beans and a light chiante. Another,Entry ID: 436
Author: Chip
Date & Time: 2006-08-16 19:32:50
hid in a small barrel until his demands were met. And this little pirate had roast beef, and this little pirate had none. Only James T Kirk could save them nowEntry ID: 437
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-08-25 16:24:38
So Cpt Kirk called up the Enterprise as well as Zap Brannigan to help bring the pirates to justice. They both busted out their lasers only to find a sea monsterEntry ID: 438
Author: John Woo
Date & Time: 2006-08-26 19:20:41
with a penchant for eating washed up seventies TV stars with bad hair pieces. They were thus eaten and so the lovely Pirates were free to plunder and pillageEntry ID: 439
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-08-29 18:01:19
until they were stopped by a feminist sick of looting and raping. She locked them up and sent them to bed without their tea and they were good little boys thenEntry ID: 440
Author: novice
Date & Time: 2006-08-30 17:03:45
even going so far as to compose a little bedtime song about a lovely pony. Sill in the morning the woke up rather annoyed and decided to ply their trade in theEntry ID: 441
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-08-31 13:44:59
acid mines. They weren't quite sure how to mine acid but they were jolly well going to give it a good try. Crikey exclaimed a nearby crocodile hunter whoEntry ID: 442
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-09-05 14:52:04
, to avoid controversy and bad taste, was not the late, great Steve Irwin, stumbled across a hugeEntry ID: 443
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-09-05 19:42:49
one eyed trouser snake(cough) with a bad temper. He wasn't going to hang around for the beast to start spitting so quickly extracted the mongoose from his pockEntry ID: 444
Author: fat bob
Date & Time: 2006-09-07 15:22:30
marked younger sibling Geoffrey, or "freak boy", as he was affectionately known by the family. As well as his unfortunate viral affliction, he also sported aEntry ID: 445
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-09-14 20:18:43
an afro wig (the virus also caused hair loss) and Teflon coated shell suit that ensured any excessive skin flaking went quickly to the ground. Despite this heEntry ID: 446
Author: scooby snack
Date & Time: 2006-09-19 14:29:22
found himself remarkably successful with the ladies. In fact, he often found it difficult to walk in public without being propositioned byEntry ID: 447
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-09-25 16:18:58
the hairy ones. He hated walking for this very reason, instead, he preferred toEntry ID: 448
Author: Sarah
Date & Time: 2006-09-29 17:50:28
get around in his low-ride, pimped-up gopod. That was how he liked to roll with his homies, drinking a forty of pimp juice and scoring with some sweet bootyEntry ID: 449
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-09-30 14:30:17
. The oversized spoiler, 50 inch bass speakers and modified body of his gopod made the machine very heavy , subsequently straining his modest warp drive, whichEntry ID: 450
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-10-04 10:59:31
in turn exploded, showering a near by herd of cows with small bits ofEntry ID: 451
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-10-10 14:04:09
radioactive morris dancers and latex bondage suits. Obviously not all real ale drinkers conform to this stereotype but in this case it was uncannily accurateEntry ID: 452
Author: Mystic m
Date & Time: 2006-10-25 20:33:42
. Shabba, the local locksmith, often donned such apparel in order to excite his arch nemesis -Entry ID: 453
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-11-09 13:41:21
SamaEntry ID: 454
Author: Ashish
Date & Time: 2006-11-23 07:22:28
Snake Eyes, who was reputedly the worst scrabble player in all the northern territories. This impacted very little upon his social life becauseEntry ID: 455
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-12-01 18:36:01
he had recently lost his arms and legs in a freak yaughting accident and was thus, not overly predominant on the local boardgame scene. He often wondered if whyEntry ID: 456
Author: neverclear5
Date & Time: 2006-12-03 16:00:35
bird lived on after her kids tv appearances, or if she was moved to some kind of zoo, or lived a free-lance life as some kind of half-derrangedEntry ID: 457
Author: An Electric Jesus
Date & Time: 2006-12-04 00:47:13
scouser parrot, circling Albert Docks in search of a someone she couldEntry ID: 458
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-12-04 10:33:53
slowly nibble to a state of parroty bliss. This is because her saliva contained a bizzare compound much resemblingEntry ID: 459
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2006-12-04 19:36:11
a small colony of pygmies wielding loofahs. This discovery was made by the venerable explorer and pirate Lavendar Beard, who had, since birth, been able toEntry ID: 460
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2006-12-05 17:48:06
I am the best.Entry ID: 461
Author: zhyjie
Date & Time: 2007-01-12 15:56:57
exclaimed mighty mouse before being run down by Old Lady Karma in her Subaru Impreza. This has nothing to do with this story but I thought I'd mention it anyhoEntry ID: 462
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2007-02-12 14:25:02
e who plies her trade out the back of such a vehicle deserves respect. However, I inadvertently fell over the spare TiVo which was kept in the loft for suchEntry ID: 463
Author: fat bob
Date & Time: 2007-02-16 13:35:18
small people as Tom Cruise and Ronnie Corbett. The wee folk had a party in my loft that lasted well into the early hours, withEntry ID: 464
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2007-02-20 11:17:04
two thimbles full of shandy enough to make the little people sing and dance like the happy little pixie folk they were. This all changed when theEntry ID: 465
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2007-03-06 13:45:57
Mixies arrived. The Mixies are an excitable collection of novelty items with lifes and minds of their very own. The worst Mixie wasEntry ID: 466
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque
Date & Time: 2007-03-26 17:50:33
a rabbit with an advanced state of the disease. He was looking for an NHS Trust which treated his disease. This time he was in luck.He found a doctor called VETEntry ID: 467
Author: Flashoptimist
Date & Time: 2007-05-31 12:19:05
TTRUCHIO Soprano, a flashing eyed Italian paramedic withEntry ID: 468
Author: Debbie
Date & Time: 2007-05-31 16:01:14
an unbearable cold, which kept everyone in suspense. Some years before that night, none would have thought that...Entry ID: 469
Author: Papui
Date & Time: 2007-06-03 13:37:30
gravity could drop so low that human arms and hands could work as wings. Her inelegant flutter now took her up to the ledge and she looked into the window ...Entry ID: 470
Author: b$$
Date & Time: 2007-06-06 14:02:17
to find her doppelganger staring back. Her first instinct was to glide away from the building, back to the relative safety ofEntry ID: 471
Author: Twinsen
Date & Time: 2007-06-13 20:58:51
VigEntry ID: 472
Author: Daniel
Date & Time: 2007-06-28 20:02:35
- there I said it Vig, Vig ... Vig. What now? Will you have me punished? ... Oh no, please. Back off with thoseEntry ID: 473
Author: Gomez
Date & Time: 2008-10-28 22:31:54
hot pants. I refuse to wear such short shorts. Still I'm sure that I would look good in them as long as they did not make my bum look too bigEntry ID: 474
Author: The Mayor Of Albuquerque1
Date & Time: 2008-11-19 18:31:26
or constrict the flow of blood to my carbuncle. My magical carbuncle was a source of immense pride to the folk ofEntry ID: 475
Author: Cornelius Bear
Date & Time: 2008-11-19 18:42:08
Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. However it all ended with the arrival of music by the txt http://thetxt.bandcamp.com/
phew!Entry ID: 476
Author: the txt
Date & Time: 2009-04-02 15:41:41
by night cyber cultural pedants, by day? who knows
http://thetxt.bandcamp.com/Entry ID: 477
Author: the txt
Date & Time: 2009-04-02 15:43:19
I sure didn't for it was some crazy website, frankly I have seen betterEntry ID: 478
Author: Iainnotandrew
Date & Time: 2009-06-21 02:09:59
$(entry)Entry ID: 479
Author: $(name)
Date & Time: 2009-06-27 07:52:04
$(entry)Entry ID: 480
Author: $(name)1
Date & Time: 2009-06-27 07:56:12